Lighter Side

You remind me of Haley’s Comet. I don’t want to see you again for another 74 years.

I think it’s time we cancel our gym membership. We’re not working anymore.

We need to take our relationship to the previous level.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would keep ‘u’ and ‘I’ pretty much where they are, far apart from each other. Maybe even make them a little further away.

Our relationship is like your financial status: broke!

I’m breaking up with you for religious reasons. You think you’re God, and I don’t.

Honey, I’m not gay. But after dating you, I’m willing to learn.

I regret having held in...