The Lighter Side

Is there anything more capitalist than a peanut with a top hat, cane and monocle, selling you other peanuts to eat?

I can relate to Alice in Wonderland. She just keeps randomly eating and drinking with the hope that it might magically solve her problems.

In a thousand years, archeologists will dig up tanning beds and think we fried people as punishment.

Teenagers should be required to read a book for every ten selfies they take.

I have a joke about your girlfriend's podcast, but it's long and boring, and nobody wants to hear it except your girlfriend.

If I threw out everything in my life that...